Hey all you Odyssey fans! I’m Wooton Bassett, here to take you on our oddest Odd In Odyssey oddity yet! (Wow! Try to pick apart that one! That was pretty great wasn’t it?) But, speaking of oddity, last week was the strangest, funnest, most tiring week I’ve ever had!
It all started when Penny and I got tickets to go to Disneyland. I was looking forward to a whole week of crazy rides, creepy costumes and overpriced licorice. But then, just three days before we had to leave, Penny came down with the flu, and the doctor said she couldn’t go. I was reeeally disappointed, and I felt even worse when she told me I should just go without her.
“Now Wooton,” she said to me, “There are two tickets. Why don’t you go find someone who would want to come with you?”
I thought for a second, then I snapped my fingers. “I know exactly who would want to come!” I shouted.
I was at Mrs. Kramer’s door within five minutes. Now, I understand that Mrs. Kramer would probably be the last person you would ask to a cool place like Disneyland, but I did it because in the Bible it says to show love to everybody- not just the people we really really like. You know, really, not a lot of people show love to Mrs. Kramer, and so I thought she might need it for a change.
“Rides?” she asked. “I hate rides.”
“Oh. Well that’s okay! There’s still a ton to do in Disneyland! Let’s see, we could go into Toon Town and see Mickey Mouse, and-”
“I hate Mickey Mouse.”
It took a lot of convincing, but finally she said she’d come! I couldn’t believe it! I bet I felt as victorious as Captain Absolutely after he escaped from the Legion of Bad Guys and accidentally set them free from prison at the same time. See, Mrs. Kramer said she’d come, but she also said that she would hate it the whole way.
One of the things she hated first was the plane ride. “I hate being with a lot of people in an enclosed space for a long time,” she said.
I had to admit, it was pretty stuffy in there. “But look, Mrs. Kramer,” I said, pointing out the window at all the city lights way below us. “All the lights look beautiful from all the way up here. And look at the moon, and the stars!”
I managed to get her interested in the outdoors. We talked about stars and their chemical compounds, and then that got us talking about chemistry, and she told me about how she hated chemistry all throughout high school. But man! By the time the plane ride was over, I could list off at least 145 things that I never knew she hated! I’ll bet I knew more about Mrs. Kramer than anyone else in Odyssey. It was great! We got checked in to our hotel rooms and rested up for the thrilling day we were going to have.
And it was exciting. The most excitingest part of the day was when I found out that they had licorice as part of the continental breakfast! We hurried and ate then drove as fast as we could over to the park.
“Woooow!” I said after we got through the gate. “Look at all those rides! It looks like a giant maze of excitement, amazement, exhilaration, and awesomeness!”
“Looks more like a pile of scrambled intestines,” said Mrs. Kramer.
First, we went and bought ourselves the signature Disneyland badge of honor! We got the ten dollar felt hat with the elastic chinstrap and the plastic Mickey Mouse ears that stick out the top. Then we went all over the place. I convinced Mrs. Kramer to do a ton of rides. The first one we did was Splash Mountain. Then we did Thunder Mountain Railroad like twenty times, and then we did the Indiana Jones one where the rock comes rolling straight toward you and you freak out and almost die but then just before you get crushed you dive down into a tunnel and stay alive! That was one of my favorites. Then we did Space Mountain, and after that one we both had to take an aspirin and one of those anti- nausea pills that keeps you from throwing up. You know, now that I think about it, we should have taken those before the ride started.
We took a break for fast food sandwiches and milkshakes at a restaurant outside the park.
“These are great milkshakes,” I said. They were white and melty, perfect for a sugary recharge.
“They’re milkshakes?” said Mrs. Kramer. “I thought I was sipping on a giant cup of shaving cream.”
Now that I think about it, they did sort of resemble shaving cream. It was already getting pretty late outside, but there was one more ride that I wanted to do before it was too late.
The Tower of Terror was the most terrorizing terrible tower I’ve ever been in! It was super creepy, and in part of it it looked like the entire floor fell out from under us. The rides in the elevator were the worst. Half the time I was expecting to get struck by lighting. The worst part was when we reached they very very top. The view was amazing! As I munched on my last string of licorice, I took a video on my phone of the whole thing to show Penny when I got home. It was dark, and we could see all of Disneyland way out before us. The lights were glittery, we could see the Ferris wheel, and it was just a superhero’s eye view from up there! But then the elevator shut off and all of a sudden we started falling! This was the part of the ride I had been waiting for!
I screamed pretty much the whole way down. Mrs. Kramer laughed and whooped and hollered the whole way, and she had the greatest time of her life. She took a video of me with licorice stuck up my nose (it got there when I dropped it and we started falling). It was the most terrorizing ride I’ve ever been on. I guess that’s why they call it the Tower of Terror! Believe me, I was glad when that one was over. But Mrs. Kramer had so much fun! She talked about it the whole way back to the hotel while I tried to get the color in my face to turn from green back to tannish pink. You don’t even want to know what color it was after we went on California Screamin’ the next day.
Anyway, after that we had a blast! It was the best vacation ever. When we got home I couldn’t wait to tell everyone about all the crazy things we did. I couldn’t show them videos or photos because I dropped my phone in the alligator pool at the safari.
“Thanks for taking me along, Wooton,” Mrs. Kramer said to me when I was dropping her off at her house. “That may have been the most fun that I’ve had in a long time.”
“Wow! No way!” I exclaimed. “I thought you said you’d hate it the whole way!”
“I did. Believe me Wooton- there is nothing I hate more than having fun.”
This is CaptainPrecious reminding you that to join the nerds, go to Odysseynerds!